Loose Change: Top 12 free association names

The following is purely fictional and meant for entertainment purposes only. By entertainment, we mean we hope you laugh while reading this, while framing this, or while burning this. Any similarities between this and actual events is strictly coincidental and frankly, dumb luck. Remember to remind your lawyer about the made-up part, OK?

Like The Fixx have always said, “one thing leads to another.”

I believe they were actually talking about either a cheating lover or the dynamics of professional dominoes, but still, the words ring kind of prophetically true.

Some words, naturally and mysteriously, lead to others. You say “Simon”, I say “Garfunkel.” You say “Black” and I say “Decker.” You say “rutabaga” and I… just flash a blank stare (come on…“rutabaga”??)

There are also some names you see (at least I do) that beg a response. Herein, the 12 hockey player names that continually get my brain moving and confirm to my doctors that (for a few minutes, at least) the comatose segment of my disease has passed.

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12 Shane “Please Wear That Sexy” Hnidy

11 Keith “Lost My House To A” Carney

10 Brent” It’s Red and Itchy and It” Burns

9 Ruslan “Mustang” Salei

8 Trevor “Take Three Tablets” Daley

7 Ryan “All My Tapes are” Bayda

6 Ryan “I Don’t Really Think I” Suter

5 Rico “Can You Get Any” Fata

4 Martin “Ride the Bus To” Skoula

3 Kurt “I Think the Milk’s Gone” Sauer

2 Luc “I Am Your Father” Bourdon

1 Andrei “Lazy” Zyuzin

Charlie Teljeur, creator of THN’s hockeysockpuppettheatre, brings you Loose Change every Tuesday and Friday only on

Want to talk to Charlie about love, life, or Loose Change? Email him at