Proteau’s Blog: Tight and loose

• I’m all for increased media access to NHL players, but putting Devils man-of-many titles Lou Lamoriello on a conference call is an abject waste of phones and ears.

Speaking to reporters Tuesday, Lamoriello couldn’t find it within himself to confirm his checking line of John Madden, Jay Pandolfo and Sergei Brylin would be covering Ottawa’s top line of Jason Spezza, Daniel Alfredsson and Dany Heatley during their second round series.

“(I’m not going to talk) about what our thoughts are,” Lamoriello said.

Yeah, Lou, the Sens were thinking Madden’s line would get Dean McAmmond, Patrick Eaves and Christoph Schubert. Lighten up, already.

• At the other end of the quotable spectrum is Chris Chelios. There’s a feature on the Red Wings blueliner in this week’s Sports Illustrated that includes some typically fantastic musings. Here are just a couple:

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On living in Malibu: “The worst thing is the insincerity of the summer residents—everybody’s always suing each other. Malibu is full of crazy people, but Dick Butkus is a neighbor of mine. The first time he came over, he sat on my couch, grunted at my wife and stared at my kids, who were in awe and scared s—less at the same time.”

On the afterlife: ”I’d like to die fast and painlessly at a hockey rink. I’ll watch a game, have a heart attack and go. Then I want my body to be frozen and stored off I-290 in Chicago. Overhead will be a neon sign flashing my NHL numbers, 24 and 7, nonstop.”

See, Lou, it’s really not that difficult to be honest at all. It can even be kinda fun.