All-Names Team: The Best Names in the 2023 NHL Draft

What’s in a name? 

Romeo might have considered this on a more philosophical level, but there’s a lot of deep meaning behind surnames in general. That’s especially true in hockey, when every draft year, fans are bound to see a player’s last name that they’re just dying to have on the back of a jersey.

The 2023 NHL draft is no exception. Here’s the NHL all-names team, as chosen by yours truly.

First Team

LW: Quentin Musty, Sudbury (OHL)

While the name could probably describe some folks’ hockey equipment, the name “Musty” is actually partially an English name with deep ties to Gloucestershire County. Musty is a projected first-round pick in the draft thanks to his combination of power forward aggression and delicate puckhandling. That allows him to notch assists at ease, as evidenced by his 56 helpers in 57 combined regular-season and playoff games this year.

C: Will Smith, US NTDP (USHL)

Now here is a story – all about how – Will Smith got drafted to the NHL. I’ll save you the rest of this parody, but yes, there’s a top-five prospect in this draft who shares a name with the legendary Fresh Prince star. Smith is a massively popular surname, so it was only a matter of time before a Will Smith hit the ice. Smith the hockey player is a gifted playmaker with special hands. Look for him to go in the top five in the draft – and for your favorite sports commentator to really lean into the Fresh Prince puns.

RW: Gavyn Thoreson, Andover (Minnesota High School)

Quite literally of Viking origin, Thoreson means “Son of Thor” in Norwegian. Talk about a hockey name! Thoreson has shown he can score at any level. He put up 23 points in 23 games with USHL Waterloo, then left to help Andover High School defend his hometown’s state tournament title. He then notched 97 (!) points in 31 games before his school was eliminated in the Minnesota semifinals.

D: Hunter Brzustewicz, Kitchener (OHL)

A product of the USA National Team Development Program who played his most recent season in major junior, Brzustewicz’s name would be one heck of a Scrabble word. A Polish surname pronounced brew-STEHV-itch, Hunter often goes by the nickname ‘Brue.’ Often, that name comes with praise. He’s an effective transition defenseman who, while he experienced some growing pains acclimating to the OHL, helped Kitchener spark offense from the back end.

D: Rodwin Dionicio, Windsor (OHL)

In ancient Greece, Dionysus was the god of wine and revelry. And Dionicio – a Spanish variant of the name – has already lived up to the hype, celebrating a shootout goal during Switzerland’s miracle run at the world juniors by hitting the griddy. That goal showed exactly what teams can expect from him: he’s a deceptive puckhandler with a shot to match.

G: Jani Lampinen, Kiekko-Espoo (Mestis)

Usually, goaltenders don’t want to hear about “lamps,” but Lampinen might be the exception. He was Finland’s goaltender in the 2022 World Junior Championship, posting a 1.68 goals-against average and .933 save percentage in three games. His name means “one who lives by a pond,” which would probably make him pretty popular on the ODR circuit.

Second Team

LW: Colby Barlow, Owen Sound (OHL)

Bar-low is a perfect name for a goal-scorer like Colby, who scored 49 times in a combined 63 regular-season and playoff games this season for Owen Sound. The name combines the Old English “bere” for barley and “hlaw” for hill. Barlow is a gifted sniper thanks to his high-end shot. He also knows how to find open space to use it. That deadly pairing should make him a highly coveted prospect as he climbs the hill of his hockey career.

C: Jonathan Castagna, St. Andrews College (Ontario High School)

In Italian, Castagna means chestnut. Joey Chestnut, anybody? And the way Joey Chestnut dominates hot dog eating contests also describes how Castagna feasts on the ice. In his Ontario high school league, he scored 72 points in 50 games thanks to his combination of speed and hands. If there’s open space, he’s going to find it.

RW: Kasper Halttunen, HIFK (Finland)

The surname “Halttunen” is mostly found in Finland, but Halttunen the hockey player stands out as a scoring bruiser. His 6-foot-3 frame gives plenty of size, and he’s not afraid to throw it around. His scoring hasn’t translated to the Liiga, but that doesn’t take away from how he can literally halt his opponents through his physicality.

D: Nicholas Wolfenberg, Okotoks (AJHL) 

By all means, Wolfenberg is a late-bloomer in this draft class, but his name has been awesome since Day 1. The two components, “Wolfen” and “Berg,” break down into the words “wolf” and “mountain.” And with 165 PIMs across the past two seasons in addition to his 6-foot-2 frame, he plays with a snarl befitting his surname.

D: Herman Berggren, Linkoping J20 (J20 Nationell)

Not only does this name rhyme, but the two parts, “Berg” and “Gren,” stand for “mountain” and “branch,” respectively. Both are adequate descriptors of this tall and physical Swedish defenseman, who stacks up at 6-foot-4 and 200 pounds. He’s projected to be a seventh-rounder, but his premium size could lead teams to take a chance. The name’s certainly cool enough.

G: Scott Ratzlaff, Seattle (WHL)

As a shorter goaltender in this draft class, Ratzlaff is used to fighting through screens and scrums to come up with timely saves. That all makes sense, given that his last name is a Germanized version of the Slavic “Ratislav,” which means battle and glory. That tenacity has earned praise from scouts as something that could serve him well at the next level.

Honorable Mentions

LW: Florian Xhekaj, Hamilton (OHL)

This Czech-Canadian winger probably sounds familiar, thanks to his enforcer brother, Arber, who plays for the Montreal Canadiens. Florian himself is talented in the same physical fields, but he’s more of a menace down at the net front than in the penalty box. Players on the Habs would lead you to believe this name is pronounced “Wi-Fi,” but it’s actually pronounced “Jack-Eye.”

D: Aiden Celebrini, Brooks (AJHL)

Much like Dionicio, this name draws meaning from celebration. But that’s not the only reason to love this name. It’s shared by Aiden’s brother, Macklin, who could be the first overall pick in the 2024 draft. Between both of these brothers, keep an eye out for the Celebrini name in the future.