It's not Mika Zibenejad's fault that he owns one of the truly idiotic contracts that the Rangers ever delivered.
It's ridiculous in length and $. (Z is laughing with a $8,500,000 Cap hit.)
He should be dumped – like as early as yesterday – but that darn "No Trade Clause" has GM Chris Drury pulling his well-coiffed hair out. What to do? What to do?
One idea was to make life so Mika-miserable that he'd want to take the next train out of Penn Station to Anywhere – even Pasadena! Here's one plan:
A good way to give Z's nerves "The Jitterbug" is to tell him he's not going to get one minute of playing time once the new season begins. Not even ten seconds. That should get him to agree to go bye-bye. No? YES!
If that doesn't work, Plan B is to tell him that he knows less about music than Taylor Swift's butler, Joe Brahms, and Buzz Chopin.
How? How do we get this guy on a Slow Boat To China? I put the question to Maven Roundtable Chairman Jess Rubenstein and he didn't know whether to laugh out loud or weep sheepishly.
Mika Zibanejad Posts Emotional Message About Chris Kreider In Aftermath Of Trade
Chris Kreider’s departure from the New York <a href="https://thehockeynews.com/nhl/new-york-rangers" target="_blank">Rangers</a> is especially emotional for one player.
"Start with the fact that both Mika and Panarin are going to be a lot harder to trade than Drury. And, furthermore that 'We Can Force Them To Accept A Trade" nonsense is not going to work.
"Z's contract is not moveable unless the player decides where he wants to go. Drury can't do anything if Mika is unwilling to accept a trade."
According to My Man Rubenstein, come July 1, no matter what the signing bonus money both Breadman and Mika have is going to be part of the Rangers' Cap and there's nothing the Rangers can do to remove it.
Therefore, in Genius Drury's eyes, Mika Zinbanejad is a walking migraine!