
At last the big breakthrough that the Rangers and their loyal fans have been waiting for – an answer to their slumping prayers.
No, it's not a lack of backchecking, forechecking or checking their "toques" at the door.
What they need is a good old-fashioned – or new fashioned, I don't care – shrink.
My inspiration comes from the New York Post's esteemed Blueshirts beat writer Mollie Walker who helped explain the all-club funk.
"This has been a war inside Rangers heads more than anything," wrote Mollie.
To which I wondered, "Why didn't I think of that?" But, no matter, pursuing a good angle, Walker interviewed defenseman Braden Schneider and there was nothing defensive about his thoughts.
"It's all mental," he told Mollie. "We're just a hair off."
Well, until Braden finds that follicle I decided to end this "war in the Rangers heads."
A friend of mine named Judy Ross is a shrink who likes sports. She believes that the Rangers should lighten up. "They need some laughs," added Judy, "and I don't mean Matt Rempe. I mean humor."
Before playing Dallas, Matt or Braden should try these one-liners on the boys. Can't hurt, can it? (I hope not.)
GAG ONE: "My superiority complex turned out to be an inferiority complex. I said, 'Great, that makes me the least of my problems!'"
GAG TWO: Nerve (Chutzpah) is going to shrink because of a split personality – and asking for a group rate!
GAG THREE: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? One, but the lightbulb has to really want to change!
P.S. If none of these work, Peter Laviolette should take the whole team to see a Mel Brooks movie!